Betty’s Gardening Tips for July

Good morning.

I am Betty. But you may call me Betty. I play violin for my friends. Sometimes I SHOUT AT THEM and make them eat PORRIDGE.

I am also very keen on plants and all the furry woodland chums in the M.O.D garden.

Here are Betty’s Gardening Tips for the month of July.

In July, you may LOOK AT PETUNIAS. The ONES THAT YOU GREW AND DID NOT INFORM ME ABOUT.

Here are some PETUNIAS.

Do NOT EAT THEM. They will make your tummy all wrong. Betty CANNOT CURE THIS.

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MORE PETUNIAS

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Are they NOT BEAUTIFUL?

MORE!

FEAST your EYES. ON THESE BEAUTIES.

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Betty thanks you for your UNDERSTANDING.

xxx

Date Change for Frome Gig!

Hello.

Due to unforeseen, and frankly reprehensible, possibly even nefarious reasons, Alex has decreed that the 27th October 2012 is International Alex Day.

Hitherto, this date was occupied by a gig by your BEAUTIFUL M.O.D. Thanks to Alex’s pretentions and wilful imagination, we are forced to grovel to YOU and make a change to the advertised date.

During IAD, we are informed, it is compulsory for an Alex to lie down in a darkened room making ridiculous bleeping robot noises.
Your Alex then refers to himself in the third person ALL DAY and will only consume OIL and AXLE GREASE.
He will also only answer when spoken to and only to inform you loudly that he is from the planet ALEXA MINOR IN THE UPPER QUADRANT OF THE ALEX SYSTEM.

M.O.D are inclusive sorts. To this end, the gig at The Griffin, Frome, has been moved to International Alex Day Eve, which, for those schooled in the comprehensive system, is FRIDAY, the 26th OCTOBER.

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Here is a photo of Alex. MIGGLE was unavailable.

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You are now allowed to RIDICULE Alex

RIDICULE HIM